Me, on watching the promos for the new season of the Sarah Silverman program: Would you rather lick a dog's ass or (pointing at cat) that cat's ass?
Brando: I think I'd rather blow my brains out, with a gun on each side to make sure I got both sides of my brain. I'd rather suck plutonium out of a Kryptonite enchilada. But if someone had the gun to your head, I suppose I'd take the cat.